The theory of the Missing Cats

child's drawing of cats in Harold's Cross

What you see above is one of the prize-winning artworks from the Harold’s Cross Festival Children’s Art Competition 2020. This was created by Ariadna de las Heras O’Connor (aged 8) and she called it: “Cats in Harold’s Cross”

Imagine my surprise when the Professor became apoplectic over it!

D’you see, the Professor has a theory (no, not a theory, a statistical fact, he says), that Harold’s Cross has a problem with cats.

“Did you ever see so many ‘missing cat’ posters in one small village”, says he to me the other day, “…one day it’s Misty, the next it’s Mandy, then it’s Fred and then Max… Did you ever stop to look at those posters?

“Well I have”, he says, “and I’ll tell you right now that it’s all a travesty, a complete perversion, a grotesque distortion of feline proportions.”

Child's drawing of a snail
… perhaps I should’ve picked the snail picture instead

“Take the poster of Misty”, he says, “it’s a black cat with a white chest and a white tip on its tail, right? – but did you see the poster for Mandy – she’s also a black cat with a white chest and a white tip on her tail, right? – Ergo, it’s the SAME CAT.  And then there’s Fred and Max and Timmy – they’re all THE SAME CAT !”

Foolishly I ventured that perhaps they were all from the same family of felines – cousins perhaps?

But he glared at me over his horn-rimmed spectacles as he explained that cats wheedle their way into the affections of humans;  for a while they make themselves at home with one family (who plies them with the very best of food from their table) but then they go off and enter another home for more tasty morsels;  the second family feeds him their fancy sardines and cream and… and they decide to adopt him and give him a name etc but then, he disappears from there too and so it goes…

photo of cat sitting beside missing cat poster in window

The distraught families then produce MISSING CAT POSTERS which they stick to every window, every tree and every lamppost in the area.

(perhaps I should’ve picked the snail picture instead – I liked that too – and it featured in the Harold’s Cross 10 Years of the Festival film)

Of course, the answer to this conundrum is to have one large noticeboard on the village green – for all the ‘missing cat’ posters. Then we’d see if it’s a theory or a fact!

You’re comments are always welcome, down below.


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